November 22, 2010

Modern Manners Monday: What Would YOU Do?



A friend of a friend just moved to your town.

Your mutual friend has gone away for the Thanksgiving holiday.  Since the "friend of a friend" knows no one but the two of you yet, you are happy to invite her over to celebrate Thanksgiving with you and your family.  She should not be alone with a TV dinner.  She gladly accepts your invitation.

A day before Thanksgiving, she calls to say that she will not be dining with you and your family because "a better offer came along".

What would YOU do?

20 comments:

  1. Nothing. It's her loss that she is going to miss out on amazing food. I will also remember that comment for the next time I have something. If she wonders why she's not invited, I'll tell her "I assumed you would have something BETTER to do. "

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  2. Rude.

    That would be the last invitation she got to my dinner table—that's for sure. She's my friend's friend—not mine. No need to put up with such behavior. Ever.

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  3. This exact thing has happened to me. Except it was a friend of mine who had started coming over to dinner with my family on a regular basis with his daughter. One evening just as I was about to serve the meal he received a call from a lady friend and suddenly had to leave. The next day I found out that he met her at a restaurant for dinner. I NEVER had him over again. I even made sure he knew the reason that his meal ticket was gone.

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  4. Even if the offer was "better", she should have enough decorum not say that. I'd be good with this situation. I'd be happy that I hadn't invested any true time in nurturing a friendship with her.

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  5. I wouldn't think anything of it. I did the "friend" thing and invited her. I'm not easily offended. It's not like you went out of your way to buy extra for one person. She could have felt depressed or uncomfortable because she didn't know anyone! I would extend an invitation to her in the future. It's not that serious to me.

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  6. I'm with Tonya. Look at it as a good story. You were nice to your friend, and that's what counts. Life is too short to focus on perceived slights.

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  7. I would probably be relieved. I only invited her because I felt bad for her, not because I really wanted her to come. I don't really know her that well....

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  8. Michael and Tonya are on it!! You don't really have any emotions invested in this situation. You were just doing a friend a favor. It's not easy to entertain someone at your home who no one knows...not even you! Move on!!

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  9. Wow, how tacky of her. Not something I'd lose sleep over, but she wouldn't receive another invitation.

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  10. I think I am with Michael and Tonya here. I saw a quote the other day that I liked and I think it suits this occasion.

    "Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you - not because they are nice, but because you are." -Unknown

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  11. Seriously, who says things like that these days? This person was better off simply saying, "Something came up and I apologize, but I wont be able to attend. Thanks for being so gracious."

    http://mrgoodwillhunting.blogspot.com

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  12. I'd say it's no skin off my back. More leftovers for us!

    Happy Thanksgiving Shameeka.

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  13. I do think this is a situation where a lie is allowable, as in "I can't come because ... my dog is going to get sick."

    You are allowed to give yourself a point for extending the hand of friendship, while you cut everyone else a bigger piece of pie.

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  14. I would give her some slack, she has moved somewhere she seemingly only knows one person? she might be shy and feel overwhelmed at your place, but didn't want to say that

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  15. I'd laugh, tell her "boo and bye", then go on about my holiday!!!

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  16. Well I wouldn't give it a second thought, but it was VERY tacky to tell you she had a better offer. However you now know not to bother to invite her to anymore holiday gatherings.

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